Recovering Neatfreak: Mess
Lisa Jo. Baker's challenge is to write for just five minutes, no edits on a certain word. So here we go: MESS.
Mess. My heart, my brain, my kitchen floor.
The constant chaos of three little boys three and under living in this home day in and day out is exhausting my mind, my spirit, and my eyes. It is a mess. Always.
Pre children I would be upset if water spots were in the sink or a book out of place. God had a different plan for me when he gave me my boys. He wanted me to experience true, abundant, messy life. He wanted to stretch me to see past myself. We enter into this world messy and it is beautiful. We live everyday and it gets messy too. I don't see the beauty in the lived-in-ness of my home. I physically cannot keep up with it all. I am not in complete control. , dirty crocs, spaghetti sauce stains on my white cabinets, and magnets all over the fridge. They truly rob me from enjoying life some days. A clean home makes me happy. What makes me happier is a clean heart. A heart focused on Jesus and free from the burden of a perfect home. Free to live that beautiful, messy existence with my messy boys. Seeking beauty, joy and purpose in living with them in lieu of the state of my home. There is a challenge. A clean heart, clear mind and eyes focused on Jesus will distract me from the physical mess. If my heart is not a mess, my children notice and learn from that in a much deeper way than the mess on the floor. I give in Lord, I give in. You have me in this mess to experience you. Here I am, mess and all.
And five minutes over!!
Honestly with love,