christian

Words

Monday, January 13, 2014

By no means am I a gifted writer. I use the term,"writer" loosely.


I am a vomiter of words. 

It feels goods to just get it all out, doesn't it?
Only a mom runs towards vomit not away from it. So here I am. 

This space of words all jumbled together helps me make sense of myself. God speaks to me here. As I open my mouth and all sorts of junk just comes pouring out--when I am almost done with my nonsense--almost empty of myself--there He is. I find myself, I can hear him whispering more clearly. Sweet, sweet words of solace. Of grace.

Words on a page have given me grace for years. Through seven years of infertility, I wrote. Through bed rest with twins, I wrote. Through twin infants in the NICU, being pregnant again 5 months later, through infancy and toddlerhood and on- I wrote. 

Why this public place? Why not journal like a normal person?

Well, I am by no means normal. I am a mess in some senses. I think a lot of you are too. If my non-normal, jumbled up whirlwind of a life somehow gets read by someone who is feeling the same way. Success.  

If you can crack a smile after a tedious, unshowered day of picking up toys, referreeing and soul pouring into your kids- success. If you feel a girlfriend reach through the computer screen and hug your neck a little bit- success.  If an ounce of grace or hope or love are felt- success. Most of all--if you are one footstep closer to Jesus--success.

I write as a servant. I write as worship. I write for beauty's sake although it may not be beautiful to some. I write to encourage. If I am the only one who ever reads here that is fine with me.

I am here to meet with Him, come and meet with me.




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